Another year over
Author: wanderingsmith
with Gadhar
dec 31, 2015
Summary: "Barney's...Barney's a different
breed kid. You gotta be clear. And I mean, detailed,
obvious, slap him in the face clear-"
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: I ain't got no money, and nobody'd
be daft enough to pay me for this. As it is thought,
so let it be said; you make the toys, I play with
'em..
AN: so this started out as another
(actually, it was 3 separate ones) back and forth
message sequence, but then there was a dropped 'I'd
love to read that' about one of them, and I thought,
'hey, christmas present!'
Lee looked up from the old AK inner tube he was oiling
up when Barney walked into the hangar. Or stalked, more
to the point, muttering under his breath as he sorted
what looked like the mail. Too early for Christmas
bills, even if he could imagine Barney having them.
Waiting until the man was close enough for Lee to have a
chance to see what he was actually glaring at, he raised
his brows, "The hell's got your knickers in a twist,
Barney?"
The glare Barney transferred up to him was equal parts
insulted and annoyed, and only made Lee more curious at
the papers Barney waved in uncharacteristically Italian
vehemence, low grumble rising to his rumbling snarl,
"Bad enough they even *write* this shit, why the *fuck*
they pick *my* fucking address to unload it?!"
When the plastic booklet went by him again, Lee managed
to snatch it out of the air, reading the drug-company
advert headline out loud in disbelief, "Don't be left
behind by 'sexually active' seniors??" Stymied between
sympathy and laughing his ass off at Barney's utterly
offended expression, Lee cough-choked and shook as he
fumbled the metal rod he held safely onto the table with
the rest of the gun's parts.
"Christ, and implying that seniors are supposed to
*have* relationships to not disappoint in the first
place?? Hell, even the ones that *used* to have
relationships, that's like a kick in the teeth for every
one that's lost their spouse, for fuck's sake!"
Lee nodded, grin still twitching at the corner of his
lips, though the half-hidden edge of loneliness in that
rant killed most of his humour, "Easy, Barney. Not like
you're a senior, anyway; they either got the wrong
address or they send to everyone. Either way, no reason
to get worked up."
Expecting a grunt and more snarls, Lee instead watched
as Barney stilled and focused on him with a queer look
of uncomfortable surprise and confusion. "..I can't
believe I'm fucking saying this.. But what d'you mean
I'm not a senior?" and Lee could clearly see the rare
whining reluctance on the man's face as he said it, too.
Which didn't make it any less confusing. "I mean.. hell,
Barney," Lee wriggled his fingers in the quote sign, "
'Senior'. 65 and over?" he hesitated, frowning in
suspicion as Barney's stare slowly melted into a
shit-eating grin, "I mean, 60 would probably count, too,
but that's still-"
"Lee."
He should be glaring at the excess of almost preening
good cheer suddenly being beamed at him, he really
should. But Lee was damned if he could remember how long
it'd been since the last time Barney had smiled that
widely. Too damn long, anyway. He was a big enough man
to take some razzing if this was the prize, so he
chuckled as he shook his head, sending Barney a smile of
his own, waiting for the punchline, "Yeah?"
"You've never noticed the birthday on my passports?"
"Can't say I ever did, no," and he wasn't going to say a
damn word about the fact that his eyes were usually
snagged by the hard gaze Barney always had going from
his ID pictures.
"67."
Lee's mouth dropped. Only for a couple beats, but he
couldn't deny it did drop. Sixty-fucking-seven?? He
couldn't help the glance he ran from the tip of gelled
(fucking *thick*) black hair, down muscle-stretched
t-shirt and tight jeans, to worn leather boots.
Glance*s*.
He was shaking his head in disbelief by the time he
looked back up to meet eyes that were fucking gorgeous
as they laughed at him with a queerly pleased pride, "I
sure as *fuck* hope I'm not getting thrown around by
bombs and beaten to a shit by sadistic bastards when
*I*'m fucking 67! Jesus, Barney, you're even more of a
moron than I thought.."
The insult had about the effect he expected, except he
earned himself an actual out loud laugh to go with the
amused grin. Beautiful early present.
----
Why that particular discovery had been what pushed him
to decide to finally *do* something about the 'thing'
between them, Lee wasn't sure.
Some half-assed fear that Barney was suddenly going to
smarten up and retire from their crazy life, like any
semi-intelligent person would, maybe, and so disappear
from Lee's life. Which was crazy since Tool was still in
their lives.
Maybe some illogical notion that if the man hadn't made
a move at his age, he never would: even though he'd
looked.. a weird wistful kind of 'pleased' at Lee's, he
knew damn well *un-hidden*, admiration of his damned
distracting bod.
Either way, it turned out that Lee making a decision to
see if there really was any 'interest' there to be found
apparently had zero effect on his stubborn, *old*, pal's
ability to NOTICE!
He'd 'taken' Barney out to the local excuse for a
football team. They'd wrangled about what the sport was
called and how physically demanding it was right up
until Barney dropped him off, having insisted that
driving his truck made more sense than their bikes.
The less said about the movie, the better. Dragons
*were* cool; bloody man! He *knew* he should have taken
him to that boxing movie; even if it HAD looked like too
much of a romance for Barney to sit through.
The slight confusion starting to show on Barney's face
when Lee invited him to supper at a *nice* restaurant
would have been more encouraging, "If the *bloody* man
hadn't gone and started to use this fucking *gentle*,"
Lee's mouth twisted with bitter sarcasm as he continued
to rant, only slurring a bit, "Voice and started fucking
saying I don't have to ask if I want some *company*!!"
The last word was a muffled, infuriated wail as Lee
dropped his head in his hands, elbows on the counter
top.
A bit too close to his half-full glass of scotch for
Tool's peace of mind, so he reached and shifted it aside
as he coughed back the chuckles at the scenarios he'd
just heard described.
His definitely slightly drunk friend was muttering
again, voice blurred as much by his hands as alcohol,
now, "I just love him so so fucking much," Tool was
smiling when Lee raised his head and looked at him,
hands clenching on nothing as he growled hopelessly,
"And I want to fucking STRANGLE him, too!"
Tool was stuck between laughing at the lovesick
mercenary, shaking his head in sympathy at someone else
trying to deal with Barney being thick, and just sitting
there smiling a sappy smile at Lee's finally being
*willing* to. He'd spent too many years watching them
both sublimate their feelings in work, and then dealing
with the shit from that work; each alone.
" 'ow the 'ell do I get him to fucking *notice* I'm
asking him on a *date*?? When he's not trying to 'help'
me, he acts like it's a team night the team forgot to
show for!!" Christmas' exasperation in the first few
words had faded to a pitiful moan smeared on the counter
by the end.
Definitely smiling, now, but managing to stop himself
from laughing; the strong dose of sympathy that
particular question engendered helped mellow Tool out.
"Barney's...Barney's a different breed kid. You gotta be
clear. And I mean, detailed, obvious, slap him in the
face clear-" he stopped suddenly realizing what he'd
just said. To a half-drunk brit. Tool winced,
straightening and looking for better, *clearer*, words,
"But not with...you know. I mean like metaphorically,
man. Don't actually slap him with...body parts-"
Lee's initial befuddled look had faded to a thoughtful
one that kinda scared Tool, but he couldn't think of any
way to undo the damage, other than changing the hell out
of the subject and hope the man forgot this when he
sobered up. "I'm just saying make it very clear. Do
dinner at your place or something, with candles and
romantic shit, he's old school. Throw every bit of old
school you have into it. Ask him out, but say something
that makes it very obvious that it's a date-date."
A mulish look appeared on Lee's face, reassuring Tool
that he'd at least partly succeeded, "Shouldn't 'Wanna
go on a date with me?' be clear enough??"
"Yeah. But this is Barney; so, no."
----
"Well. Not exactly 'old school'," Lee glared into the
mirror, "But if the stubborn bastard misinterprets
*this*, I'm getting his IQ tested."
With one last tweak at the belt, he carefully stalked to
the main room. All curtains closed, check. Lights: dim.
Candles: flickering away. Finger food that'll keep until
they fucking got this evening to the feeding each other
stage, one way or another, check. Fucking *good* scotch
instead of champagne: on coffee table with optional
glasses. Even if his yank of a friend wouldn't
appreciate the quality. Condoms and lube: one set on
same table and another on bedside table. Christmas
music: low and Italian.
Lee took a steadying breath and leaned back against the
wall near the door, one booted foot flat against the
wall; as much to keep the belt in place as anything. Now
all that was missing-
Doorbell.
Lee rolled his eyes and reached for the cell he'd left
on the entry table, speed-dialling blind even with the
white furry shit halfway down his hand. He heard the
ring through the apartment's cheap door and shook his
head when Barney actually picked up. "Unless you brought
company, I fucking *told* you to just come in." Hitting
'End', Lee grumbled under his breath as he dropped the
thing, "They really need to come up with a way that you
can go back to slamming a phone off."
He was staring at the door as the handle turned,
consciously shrugging his shoulders back as he laid his
hands on the damn belt in case it acted up; and ready to
catch the expression on Barney's face the second he-
YES!
Grinning with impure glee as the door swung shut behind
his prey, Lee slow-stalked the four steps separating
them as Barney's wide, and now unquestionably (FINALLY!)
*hungry*, eyes stroked down his bared chest, *hesitated*
(double YES!!) at the wide belt tilting down from his
right hip to his left thigh to bridge the indecent gap
to the red felt pants hanging just a little too low
(only hanging at all because he'd tied them to the belt
on the one side! Idiot design).
By the time that look burned on down to the shiny black
leather boots sticking out of the fluffy white trim, Lee
was close enough to hear Barney's fast breathing and see
his chest rising and falling with it. He stood still,
watching the dusting of rain on Barney's hair shine as
his head came back up (I saw that hesitation, you dirty
old man!) Lee's abs, catching on the pompom tickling too
close to his right nipple to follow it up to his
shoulders, entirely bared of the coat that had been
suffocatingly hot before he pulled it to hang from just
his arms. And then that gaze finally locked with Lee's
eyes under the red hat's low-slung brim, less than a
foot left between them.
He'd had a few lines ready if Barney'd managed to hide
his reaction enough for Lee to doubt it; but he didn't
doubt *this*. The light wasn't so dim that he couldn't
see those eyes were blown, didn't see that tongue coming
out to lick at parted lips.
He didn't bother with words. Just slid his fingers into
that rain-damp hair and dove in to retrace that
saliva-slick path himself before sucking on the lower
lip as he pushed Barney back against that door,
shivering when Barney's chilled, wet leather jacket
touched his naked chest. Outright shuddering when he
felt cold hands slide over his ribs and under his bloody
Santa coat. He grinned in the middle of the kiss. Those
hands were pulling him *closer*!
They were both breathing hard when he finally pulled out
of the mutual tonguefuck they'd ended up locked in. He
sure as fuck wasn't cold anymore, and the soft but wide
belt was the only thing keeping his cock from saluting
out in the open, having escaped out the top of the
pants. He'd felt the hat take a dive when one of
Barney's hands had come up to grip the back of his
skull, and the other hand was clamped on his ass and
grinding him into the hard ridge in Barney's chinos.
He fought that hand on his skull to slide his lips to
Barney's ear, taking a bite at the lobe as Barney's
breath flowed hot and heavy on his cheek, before
growling low, "You been a good little boy?" He added an
extra rub to the grind Barney had going, making his
reward for good mercenaries plain.
When teeth closed on the edge of his jaw, it was Lee's
turn to gasp, fingers tightening jerkily as that
familiar deep voice vibrated against his skin, "Hell no,
I'm never good," his eyes dropped shut to try to grasp
at control when the hand at his back slowly slid into
the pants, a finger ghosting along his crack, "And I
ain't little."
Fuck. Holy fuck. Something about sleeping giants came to
mind. And 'Fucking finally', too. Or was that 'Finally
fucking'?
Either way, he took a shaky step back, making Barney
step with him since it looked liked that familiar
stubbornness wasn't willing to let Lee go, now; though
the movement gave Lee enough room to slide a hand down
and see how much of a boast that was.
They both stumbled when Barney's hips jerked into his
grip.
Not stopping his backward walk toward the couch, Lee
grinned into the dark promise of mayhem Barney was
sending him, " *Very* nice. You better not be faster
than light, either. I want this fucking *date*, old man,
lasting until somebody sings Auld Lang Syne in our
timezone."
Barney cracking up was definitely something he was a
sucker for. *Even* when it resulted in their clinch
loosening up.
So was letting himself drop back on the couch and then
staring up at wavering shadows of candlelight playing on
Barney's face when he un-hesitatingly followed Lee down.
Had never really had a problem with being held under
Barney's meaty grips, and he sure as fuck didn't have
one with having him press him down with that damn
sixty-seven year old body of his to make Lee's eyes
cross with pleasure.
"Don't you worry, Christmas, if slow's what you want,
slow's what you'll get," Lee couldn't help opening his
eyes to send a challenging smirk at that low threat
breathed inches from his lips, tightening his hands in
Barney's grips as an empty threat of resistance. Barney
returned a bright grin, leaning all the way in to press
their foreheads together to add more quietly, "I got all
the time in the world, for you."
AN:
LOL! had to laugh when I went researching and found
Grudge match came out dec 25, 2013, which is the
year was picturing this (between E2 and E3).
Lee's outfit, for those who prefer a visual,
http://ic.pics.livejournal.com/wanderingsmith/8437005/66864/66864_original.jpg
Happy New Year, fellow Expendables fans
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