Petrol
Author: wanderingsmith
Started aug 2, 2021
Summary: "Tank commanders?? Where will I find a *tank*-" René
choked as the colonel raised his brows toward the piano, "But colonel, I
do not think even putting Yvette in a pair of *trousers* would be
enough!"
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: I ain't got no money, and nobody'd be daft enough to
pay me for this. As it is thought, so let it be said; you make the toys, I
play with 'em..
AN: So, the show, on the one occasion I heard them refer to
gas, used the word gasoline. even though in my mind I thought europeans
used petrol. and for once, google agrees with me. gasoline was american.
so not sure how that got on the show (um. actually, just caught the
clip.. and it was Guy who said it.. maybe (being american9) he slipped
and they let it slide...). but I'm going to use petrol, thankee kindly.
and germans use benzin, so I will sometimes have them use that. because
the language thing was every so neat and clear in canon /sarcasm. so
*there*
**one jerry can (steel) weighs 4.5kg. 20litres of diesel weighs (. 80kg
@L)=16kg
"I'm sorry, René. Sugar is getting hard enough to get, let along paraffin.
But I cannot spare *any* petrol; the quartermaster corps is watching every
drop."
"But colonel!"
"But nothing." Von Strohm gave René his sneaky smirk, lowering his voice in
what he probably thought was a secretive way, "Tank commanders are the only
ones allowed to use benzin without question."
"Tank commanders?? Where will I find a *tank*-" René choked as the colonel
raised his brows toward the piano, "But colonel, I do not think even putting
Yvette in a pair of *trousers* would be enough!"
Von Strohm shrugged, still smirking, "Perhaps not, but I know someone he
*is* fond of."
René opened his mouth to ask, but snapped it closed in time, glowering at
the man who was all too obviously vastly amused at René's predicament; and
likely equally at setting up the lieutenant to become part of the barter
economy 'e 'ad up to now sniffed at 'Literally'.
"If you want petrol, René, that is the only source."
Of course that had to be when Gruber had enough of playing and came over to
the table; hat-less, open-jacketed, and smiling with an honest cheer that
only playing seemed to give him 'Not that René, of all people, blamed
him for never being able to relax in these times. Being conquerors had not
turned out to be an easier job than conquered peasant, had it?'
The colonel changed his expression to that over-jolly one that so often
turned to very piggish threats, and René braced himself. "Lieutenant! René
has something he would like to *ask* you!"
Gruber brightened predictably and turned to René, pleased, "Yes René? Is
there something I can do for you?"
René tried desperately to think of an alternative to this, staring into the
warm hazel of the lieutenant's eyes as the man waited patiently; some dim,
well-hidden amusement hinting that he was aware that the colonel was setting
him up somehow, but apparently willing to play along 'As he usually was,
for all he was as fond of his own skin as René was.'
René finally gave up stalling, all too aware of the colonel's sardonic gaze
and no doubt disappearing patience; stealing the fuel had already been
deemed impossible, and the Germans had long since found all hidden stocks.
And of course Michelle was absolutely convinced this was the perfect, and
*only*, way to go. This week. He reminded himself why he must do this 'Namely
to avoid getting shot by the Résistance', and made 'imself smile,
though he feared it was more of a grimace, with none of the even humour the
lieutenant managed to keep -even in the face of mockery and disparagement,
"Yes. Yes there is. ...Err, perhaps you could... accompany me-" he could not
quite stop a small flinch, but made himself finish with a tiny hint of
...well... hinting 'Possibly pleading', "Upstairs?"
Gruber outright glowed, his smile going wide, preening as his weight shifted
to his toes in eagerness, though René could see, behind the exaggerated
manner, that hint of amusement growing into curiosity. The days when he
would automatically believe a summon to the woodshed were long gone 'Thankfully'.
"Of *course*, René! Lead on." The soft leer and sultry tone made it very
plain he planned to watch René very closely 'As he always did, mind you';
regardless of what he thought he was about to be embroiled in. 'Perhaps
particularly since he was about to be embroiled. René would certainly take
any advance payments, in his jackboots...'
A single step on the stairs was all it took for René to realize he had
misjudged just how much he would come to regret this latest demand on his
'brave services'. The café was more than half-full of locals and soldiers.
Every one of them fully aware of what generally went on 'upstairs' during
the evening. Surely it was not that rare for René and Edith to go up to deal
with Edith's mother 'Or the English'? Even having Germans accompany
them up was far from unknown 'Admittedly usually those were 'official'
visits, with the soldiers quite formally dressed and... wearing... severe
expressions...'
But Gruber ogling him, as he no doubt was, was nothing new... *why* had such
a dead silence fallen?? They could not possibly be thinking that *René*-
well. Was doing- 'What he was actually doing...'
And where were Edith and Yvette?? Of all minutes for them to not be present
to create a diversion!
Turning jerkily on the landing, carefully *not* looking at the crowd of
idiots, René spoke toward Gruber, whose previously hidden amusement was now
utterly obvious in the deep wrinkle on his chin. René did not even need to
raise his voice 'Really!! Those people had no subtlety at all!!',
though he did pretend a little enthusiasm -not too much, mind, "Yes,
lieutenant, you *must* tell me what you think of this painting! Edith
insists it is worth a fortune..."
"It will be my *pleasure*, René," René almost sighed in relief that he was
taking the hint; then watched those shining eyes trail down his body and had
a terrible feeling- "Looking at a piece of art is such a lovely way to close
an evening."
René's mouth dropped open for a moment at the innuendo. Then he snapped it
shut with a grunt, and a frustrated glare at the lieutenant's unctuous
smile. '...Well so much for that attempt to store up his name.'
Somehow, even with the lieutenant's evil sense of humour having chosen that
moment to surface, they had got past the gauntlet without being subjected to
cheers and hollers. Leaving nothing but what was to come... René tried not
to cringe as the door closed behind the lieutenant, the bed seeming huge in
the room, with nothing but the wide-open window letting in the sounds of a
warm summer night behind him; and the very off-duty German lieutenant
mincing towards him with a seductive smile, hands behind his back
almost-unthreateningly 'Though he 'ad managed to appear suggestively
dangerous with 'is hands *tied* be'ind 'is back, when he 'ad wanted to.
While just as casually-dressed, at that'.
"Well, René? What is it that you need?"
René ignored the inviting tone, unable to find in himself his usual finesse
'Because surely he had finesse, usually...' He tried to smile again,
shaky and sweaty though it felt as his hands twitched and he wiped them on
his apron, "Err, do you, perhaps- Oh 'eck, I do not know how they do this,
would you care for a wet celery, lieutenant? Or... or a feather duster
perhaps?" 'He was absolutely NOT offering an egg whisk! Though 'e
supposed the flying helmet would not be so bad... or perhaps tank
goggles...'
That stopped Gruber in his tracks, a foot from René, so very close that a
hint of diesel and lily of the valley wreathed around him, so familiar from
far too many mad capers that the man had used to get 'cozy'.
Gruber stood blinking in confusion, "Wet celery? Why would- oh." For a
moment understanding lit his features, followed quickly with distaste, and
confusion -possibly even a hint of hurt, "René, I am not interested in...
your waitresses."
René rolled his eyes and tried to straighten, though 'e hardly thought it
would make a difference; he even put a hand on his hip, self-consciously
tilting his pelvis as he had seen the man 'And the girls' do, ...and
all too aware that the lieutenant's gaze had immediately tracked René's
movement, though René could not bring himself to look right at him while
doing such things, "I *know* that."
"Then what do you-" René made himself look up at the sudden silence,
catching Gruber's eyes widening slowly in unfaked shock, all seduction
falling away. "René?? But-" He visibly tried to regain his poise, shaky
though it came out, his eyes still troubled, "Why- ...Why now?"
It was vaguely reassuring that the man had not assumed that René had
suddenly had a change of heart, any more than he had that fateful night that
Michelle's 'perfect' plans had led him to walk directly into the wolf's,
pardon, the *lieutenant's*, lair. To whit, his room while he was taking a
bath. 'Naked.'
Or, perhaps, like several men of René's acquaintance, he did not know how to
react when 'is 'quarry' stopped running.
René grimaced, slouching more normally and meeting the lieutenant's gaze
nervously, "Because I need some petrol and the colonel says tank commanders
can use as much as they like without questions from the German quartermaster
corps."
Gruber settled solidly back on his heels, his expression smoothly turning
professional, as it sometimes did, which... gave René an odd feeling, coming
from this casual man whose crooked uniform was a mere accent on what could
almost be casual clothes 'Though thankfully such trousers were not in
fashion in France!' "I see. And... why do you so grievously need more
than your ration of benzin?"
René hesitated, but finally realized there was no use trying to deceive the
man, at this point. He would either help, as he sometimes did, which still
surprised René, or he would not; though even there, René was strangely
certain he would never arrest him 'Unless under orders, of course'.
"Err, well, because certain persons will kill me if I do not produce it." 'And
he was getting so very tired of the constant 'or we will kill you'
conversation enders.'
Gruber frowned for a moment, then sighed, shaking his head and looking at
him chastizingly, though unquestionably with fondness as well. Just this
once, René could not help but relax to see it; he knew that that misplaced
fondness was the only reason the all-too-earnest lieutenant ever broke
rules, let along risked himself, to help René, especially knowing of his
connection to the Résistance. "René. You really should not associate with
...such people. It is not wise. Or safe."
After Michelle and her demands, and von Strohm and his games already driving
'im round the twist, René found himself growling, as he was so rarely safe
to, "I assure you, lieutenant, it is *not* by choice!"
"Ah." Gruber watched him quietly for a few moments as René tried not to
fidget, not to think what the man might want -which would lead to fidgeting.
"Very well."
René knew he should look pleased, but his stomach dropped in.. well. Not
fear; here at the end of the line, he had to admit, if only to himself, that
Gruber had never been physically threatening, and René could even admit that
he believed the man's occasional boasting to trust he would not 'hurt'
someone out of inexperience. But still. Certainly negative anticipation.
Which might not be fair, seeing that if Yvette offered 'something
different', he would be eager... And the man *liked* him, surely he would-
Well. René was not so certain that the opposite of being 'hurt' did not
terrify him just as much, in this case... What if it was not 'orrible? What
if... his always-weak will failed 'Again', and *Gruber* bewitched
him, as every woman that charmed 'im had... What if-
"Come to my room at the château, after you close the café. It will be less
suspicious than if I carry them here."
His room. Of course. "Of course. Thank you, lieutenant."
Gruber nodded, gaze going distant as though he were already planning how to
acquire the fuel.
"And... should I bring the wet celery or-"
Gruber refocused on him and raised a hand with a grimace, "No René. None of
that, please. And you needn't skulk, since obviously your friends that would
normally object to your coming to see me are, in this case, well aware and
entirely for it." 'And the whole town would know within the hour, as
well, yes, thank you for that, lieutenant.' "Simply go to the guard
and tell him your name and that you wish to see me, he will escort you to my
door."
----
When he came down from his little tête-à-tête with Gruber, glaring at the
openly smirking locals that seemed to have multiplied suspiciously 'Did
the butcher have the gall to glance at the clock and *tut* at him???
...surely he should be giving *Gruber* that look...', and very glad
that the lieutenant was too busy plotting his side of things to make things
worse with more innuendo, René hurried over to the bar where Yvette was
pouring several glasses of wine.
"The colonel will not be providing the petrol. Which is just as well; we are
far too busy for you to have to slip away. *Where* did all these people come
from??"
"René! Where were you?" At Edith's hiss, René turned from opening another
bottle of red, since Yvette had just finished the previous one, "We came out
of the kitchen to find you gone and the room abuzz with ridiculous rumours.
And then it started filling up!"
René rolled his eyes, hurriedly pouring gins for Mimi, "Not *now*, Edith!"
"What about the petrol?? And did you just come down the stairs with the
lieutenant??"
"Not NOW Edith; the table by the piano is trying to get your attention!"
---
It wasn't until the evening slowed that they managed to corner René at the
bar and demand explanations. Which, on the one hand, he did not *ever* want
to voice, but on the other hand, he was more than happy to rant at them
about the lengths that the Résistance were pushing him to.
"The colonel cannot get petrol-"
Edith waved his words away as though they were suddenly unimportant, "The
grocer claimed you went upstairs to 'service' Gruber!"
René's jaw clenched, for a moment unable to say a word to the accusation.
Her mouth dropped open at his silence, "You do not mean..."
Yvette's eyes were worrisomely wide where she stood besides Edith, a rare
moment where they were of the same opinion, "But... He must have a *very*
short fuse," before René could change his sputters to indignant words 'Was
he really going to *defend* Gruber's *unknown* sexual prowess???? Wait,
even if he' 'ad known it- oh 'eck', she continued with the strangest
expression of mixed confusion and indignation of her own, "And why did he
look so serious as he came down??"
"No one has a... *short* fuse!! We did not *do* anything!" Certainly René
had never had a lover walk away looking 'serious'!! Yvette of all people
should know that!
"Then why did you look so odd when I asked-"
"...Edith... he said to go to his room after we close. I cannot believe
Michelle could possibly expect me to-" René's hands waved vaguely until he
noticed his wrist was practically... Well. Imitating Gruber!
He should have known he would get no sympathy after Yvette's only comment
had been about performance '*Gruber's* performance, at that...' It
was sad to say that he regularly got more compassion from Gruber that he did
from the women in his life...
"You ask *us* to do it all the time!"
René almost forgot himself and pointed out that, mostly, Yvette did 'it' by
her own choice, and had, long before she came to work at the café 'And
that she was as likely as Edith to force René to be friendly with the
Résistance, so *their* requirements of her were *not* his fault!'
Luckily, Edith cut in with a grim, distantly angry, expression before he
could land himself in trouble, "Yes. We've *all* had to. Stop being a
coward. At least the lieutenant is a nice man."
He almost let the conversation die on that unpleasant thought. But if she
was going to hand him such openings... "You *want* me to sleep with someone
else?"
She only rolled her eyes, her gaze going even harder, "Sleep does not often
come into it."
The reminder made René's teeth finally clack shut and they all returned to
cleaning the café in dark silence, though René could not help but suddenly
wish to stay open later. *Much* later.
----
He had made the trek to the château entirely too many times since von Strohm
had taken it as his base, including perfectly open and legitimate visits as
owner of a café to persons requesting catering services. Though usually in
the daytime. It being so late, René could not help but feel as though he
really *should* be skulking. But Gruber had been right, everyone that cared
already knew that he was going there 'And what he was going to do...'
And approved. Well, he assumed the Résistance knew, as they usually knew
what he wished they did not. His neighbours definitely knew; though
'approved' might be the wrong word, there.
If Michelle dared to smirk at him for this... Well. He might just risk her
pistol and truly quit, this time!
"Halt!"
'Oh 'eck. The *guards* would know too...'
"Who goes there?"
René raised his hands unthreateningly, wishing he had taken the tunnels
after all. "My-" he cleared his throat as he heard his voice warble almost
as badly as Gruber's was prone to, "My name is René Artois. I am here to see
lieutenant Gruber." God help him.
"Yes. I was told to expect you. Come this way."
At least he did not smirk.
René resisted asking the man to march a little slower, and reminded 'imself
that Gruber *was* a nice man. For a German. That little incident with the
firing party aside. And Yvette knew why he was doing this, so what did it
matter if 'is reputation was now a little 'worse' than it already had been?
Nonetheless, he could feel his pulse in his ears as the guard banged on the
door 'Possibly because of those stairs. ...But not likely.'
And then Gruber opened the door and met René's eyes, looking entirely
professional, aside from the once-again open uniform.
"René, come in." He waved at the soldier as René stepped forward gingerly,
"Dismissed."
As the door closed, René saw the two jerry cans behind it and swallowed
hard. "That... is very generous." He made himself meet the lieutenant's
gaze, vaguely surprised that the man was not really crowding him at all 'As
'e usually did!', "And... what is it that you... want. In return?"
Gruber's brows rose, "Want? Oh!" René watched his hands wave away the idea 'Limply...
though surely 'is wrists had to be fairly strong if 'e was in the 'abit
of- oh 'eck', "No, no, René. I am truly not asking for..." He looked
away as his voice quietly faded, and René was uncomfortably aware that he
recognized the sadness suddenly taking away the usual youthful enthusiasm
from his features. He wished he were more relieved when Gruber visibly
caught himself and cleared his face back to its familiar earnest expression,
"I hope you know, René, that I- do not wish any harm to come to you."
René nodded slowly, frowning, "Yess..."
Gruber shrugged, "The colonel is correct, they do not yet question how much
a tank commander uses, at least within very wide limits," he smiled briefly,
part boast, part plain confidence, "And with my position, a little more,
even."
René found himself uncharacteristically uncomfortable with what amounted to
generosity, try though he did to remind himself that the lieutenant was one
of the occupying Germans who were responsible for the lack of petrol in the
first place.
He looked at the two large cans that would get Michelle off his back for
hopefully a day or three as she found ways to waste it. Though he had few
hopes that they could actually get that downed aircraft to fly his unwanted
airmen out of France.
And looked up at the patient man watching him. Possibly -inexplicably-
enjoying the view rather than particularly waiting on René to... do any
particular thing.
Like stepping up to him and 'Oh 'eck, what *was* he doing??? The
lieutenant said he did not 'ave to!' And kissing the man.
He had given so many kisses in his life, surely kissing a man's lips should
be no different. Laying hands on a man's hard chest should certainly be less
fraught than anywhere near a woman's...
The lieutenant seemed to hold his breath at the hesitant press of René's
lips. And then very very controlledly released it moments later; the warm
stream of air slipping into René's mouth feeling all too intimate.
Not pressing back, though the slow parting of his lips seemed obvious enough
invitation to make it clear he was not ...angry or otherwise unhappy with
René's actions.
And he could pull back now, un-requested thanks given... But there was
nothing particularly unpleasant or worrisome here. Not even stubble. Soft,
and undemanding, lips 'Which was a bit of a change, but not
*unpleasant*. Reassuring, almost. If Gruber was not *trying* to seduce
him... Surely he would not be snared...'. His shirt rough compared to
Yvette's, but warmer; his whole body warmer against René as he slid 'is
hands over to a strong back.
He was not thinking when he pressed harder and slipped his tongue out into
the unresisting mouth that started pressing back entirely willingly, pressed
harder with his hands as they stroked, a dim wish building that the shirt
would disappear, and he could actually touch the heated skin and muscle
hidden beneath.
As his breath ran short, he suddenly realized he'd entirely lost track of
time 'He was not used to not having Edith interrupt...'; entirely
forgotten where he was and why. And who with. Lost exchanging slow schoolboy
kisses as his hands wandered under a rough tunic, exploring wide shoulders
that Gruber's usual 'manners' managed to camouflage. ...And feeling
almost... respectful... strokes to his own shoulders.
And this was what he had really feared, wasn't it?? That he would.... enjoy
'Such a weak word...' kissing Gruber. That his being a man would not
make René's skin crawl any more up close than it ever did 'Make him
nervous, oh yes'. That the utter lack of breasts would not make
kissing him any less ....'He would *never* admit this aloud!!'
arousing.... than the truthfully rather flat-chested Mimi. That... *Gruber*
did not make him recoil.
Only shiver.
It was.. reluctantly pleasant not to have Yvette's expectations that he be
masterful, or Edith's demands of a return to some fictitious past, or Mimi's
dangerously 'Distinctly dangerous' manic changes of mood to watch
for; Denise's demands of childish 'love'; Louise's expectation that he be as
'tough' as she; Michelle's that he risk his life in yet another ridiculous
plan 'for France'. To say nothing of the others that had all got distracted
by something else and left him alone along the way.
He had forgotten 'If he had ever known...' what it was like to
kiss... as *he* wanted, without needing to care about his 'performance'.
Or.. well. If Gruber was disappointed, René's pride might chafe 'Privately
and most definitely silently!', but life would get simpler, so there
was that.
And considering that the man was responding to every press and exploration
utterly in kind, René did not think they were... oh 'eck. He did not want to
think for one moment that they might share *anything*. At least not related
to *this*!!
But it was with undeniable reluctance that he broke the kiss, wondering
dismally what the man would say. Wondering... things he could not bring
himself to face while in Gruber's presence. While too warm and with too much
blood gone too far south.
Gruber's eyes were still closed, so close that René could see the feathers
of lines besides them, even as relaxed as he was, when he whispered, "I hope
you did not expect me to have the strength to actually resist." René could
not help grinning at the thoroughly glazed eyes that finally opened, even if
the thick pressure disturbingly 'Not pleasurably, nonono' against
his own tensed fly was really more of a giveaway of René's effect on him,
"It appears I am not nearly that much of a gentleman."
"Not at all, lieutenant. You have been very gentlemanly through... this
mess." Grateful that the man was not questioning René on his actions, René
was moved to try to diffuse what appeared to be actual nascent embarrassment
making Gruber look away and tense in his arms. "Did you also bring me some
dynamite, then?"
Gruber blinked in confusion, "Dyn-" his eyes widened as René, feeling very
much as though he were jumping off a cliff without a parachute 'Not that
he would be any quicker to do so *with* a parachute!!', very briefly
pressed his hips forward. And then Gruber's head swung back and he gave a
loud crack of laughter, and René was struck not only with how deep and warm
the sound was, considering the man's almost soprano voice, but with the
realization that he had never seen him truly laugh before.
"My apologies, René," he was obviously trying to choke back further chuckles
as he spoke, a never-seen grin still making his eyes shine.
René watched him quizzically, trying to ignore the warm feeling in his
chest, "Why would you apologize for laughing, lieutenant?"
"...I generally try to control myself rather better."
René shrugged, "Well, you need not on *my* be'alf." Of course then he almost
bit his tongue, realizing that 'not controlling himself' could be applied to
far more things than happy laughter!!
And indeed, those laughing eyes softened with more familiar fondness, and
the hands that had rested gently on his shoulders suddenly tightened,
pulling René into a hard embrace. But before he could make himself pull away
'If he could have'... or perhaps return the grip, since he had
apparently gone 'round the twist tonight, Gruber actually stepped back, "No,
no dynamite for your naughty friends," the momentary smirk almost made
*René* crack a laugh 'Oh he does like that compliment', "However, it
did occur to me as I brought them up that you would not enjoy carrying those
cans back to the café," René winced at the thought of carrying 40 kilograms
for any length of time, and Gruber nodded, "And that it might not be a good
idea for you to be *seen* carrying them. I thought perhaps I could take you
through the secret tunnels that have an entrance near my door, and we could
each carry one can out into the forest between here and town, where you
could hide them and then simply tell your.. 'friends', where to get them."
René nodded gratefully, "That was a kind thought, lieutenant."
Gruber reached for his jacket buttons, "Give me a moment to cover this white
shirt and I'll check the corridor to make certain the guards are not near."
Feeling off-kilter from... relief 'Surely it was relief', René's
gaze wandered the room for a moment, vaguely remembering his discomfort on
previous visits. On seeing a bottle sitting on the mantle, he smiled a bit
wistfully, turning back to the lieutenant, "Do you not even wish to ask to
share a schnapps?"
Gruber watched him steadily as he raised his chin to do up the last button,
finally answering quietly, "I have always wanted you to come have a nightcap
with me. ...But I never want you to feel obligated to give me one, René."
AN:I mean, he
really didn't take advantage here. happy to see him, yes, but with a
heavy dose of 'but *why* have you suddenly appeared out of my dreams...
instead of an immediate hug and .....well.'
S5e02 bath
S5e03 through the window
Sequel: Of pancakes and courgettes
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